Author: Farhat
There is a misconception that Islam doesn’t give proper rights to woman. If you carefully study Islam in the lights of Quran and the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ), you will understand that Islam is the only religion giving proper rights to a woman or wife.
Allah said in the Quran:
And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought. (Quran 30:21)
Below are the 12 rights of a Muslim wife upon her husband or a Muslim husband’s duties towards his wife:
- To spend upon her, to feed her. Not to be excessive in this and not to be stingy!
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: ‘Give charity.’ A man said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, I have a Dinar.’ He said: ‘Spend it on yourself.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your wife.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your son.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your servant.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘You know best (what to do with it).”‘ (Sunan an-Nasa’i 2535)
It’s in fact a reward for a man to spend upon his wife:
Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said, “You will be rewarded for whatever you spend for Allah’s sake even if it were a morsel which you put in your wife’s mouth.” (Sahih al-Bukhari)
- To be kind to her and not to harm her.
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “The most perfect man in his faith among the believers is the one whose behaviour is most excellent; and the best of you are those who are the best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi)
- To be loving to her. If you are an husband reading this, then you must do the following very often:
- Loving to her with your tongue. Nice words, tell her you love her. Tell her how good she looks.
- If your wife asks you to get her something and you can’t get it , say I’ll get it inshaAllaah.
- Helping her with housework. This is from the example of the Prophet (ﷺ)
- To be playful with his wife.
- Sharing food with her.
- To cuddle with her.
- Sleeping under the same cover.
- That the men must not curse or swear at his wife, or insult her appearance.
- A man must not boycott her and if he does (for a valid reason) he should do it inside of the home.
- A man should not expose the secrets of his wife.
Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said: The most wicked among the people in the eye of Allah on the Day of judgment is the men who goes to his wife and she comes to him, and then he divulges her secret. (Sahih Muslim)
- A man should not hate his wife. Exalt the good and minimise her shortcomings. A man should not be angry at her faults and should look at her good. To look only good in her.
- That he should make things easy upon her eg: The chores and what he requires from her.
- He should have the best manners with his wife. His wife should see the best of his manners. It is said that some men have the best manners out in the market, but when he goes home he is a ferocious lion! Kind to strange women in the markets but not to his wife in the home. The best of you are the best of you to your wives. There is no good in you if you want to help your friends but not your wife, there is no good in you if you are kind to your friends and not your wife. Combine the two and that is good!
- That the husband should be a reason for his wife to be saved from the hellfire. He should teach her and order her to forbid the evil and enjoy the good. Forbidding her from that which will lead to hell fire.
- That the man should have some type of jealousy for his wife. Jealousy of protecting her from evil, not for her to be exposed to strange men or not for her to speak to strange men etc. But not the abusive jealousy.
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “A believer must not hate (his wife) believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics he will be pleased with another”. (Muslim)
Really good poem , it helped me out! THANK YOU
Masha Allah well written.
if u fight with your wife and feel bad about her, than it is surely the shaytan trying to intimidate you that your wife is at a great fault, leaving both husband and wife in a deep sadness of not being able to get along and unable to ignore the issue. you have to think that eventually you have to tie after a day or two or more, why not bring that tie just right now just like when you will do it after 2 days? why keep burning for 2 days, just do it and remove the wall of uncompromising attitude. Go get along right away and reward yourself and your wife with love and forgiveness, and your badly bound feeling will start to melt right away, you can also do “acting” or faking if you cannot help it in real…try to act like you are forgiving and loving, and the result will still come true and your bad feeling boundness will start to unbind….the main thing is to agree and have a mindset to stop the cold war and find a way to go along again, your target should be to finish the war rather than prolong or cause some seriousness, and also learn from it from ever happening again.
Nice…..
It is something very poor from what is our right and how to honor the wife…
Sorry to say that.
The husband cannot boycot the wife because cannot disturb her…
Jealous about his wife?? Yes..because of this a number of sister even cannot go out of home!!!! We have rights to say what we need , right?
Other things that nobody says:
If shura is ordained in Qur’an why the husband cannot deal with his wife using the same method?
Marriage is not a place to have a LORD and SLAVE because this relationship only to ALLAH…
I think we are missing a number of points…
Many things that are directed to the believers, includes men and women
Rights of wife and husband is not restricted on only what is clearly HUSBAND AND WIFE… how to deal with people in general, good manners…also we need to carry ourselves in the same way with our partner, much more than that… in first to them,
what if the wife cursed the husband and spying the husband? what is the consequence?
Some of the Information in this article is incorrect.
Masha Allah Good Article:
Before Islam, there was not at all limit for men by respect to the number of wives they could have. The Holy Quran limits the total of wives to four and also commands whole equality and justice among them,
Jazzak Allah.
Can someone tell me if muslim men are allowed to date?
Kindly visit for answers:
https://islamqa.info/en/google-search?q=dating&search_engine=google
Thanks
Subhanallah, the world will be a better place if every man reads this. Thank you for the guide, I will treat my lady right. Happy wife = happy family!
Nice one
Marshalls very nice i’m jast asks a in Islam if husbsnd don’t tele any responsibly of his vibes or children do vife leve him
If husband keep saying to his vife I not good I wish u die what can vife do pleas help
That’s rude to say as no one is perfect, don’t take it personal as he is not good to talk like that, but find the root cause that what is not good and try to improve, also resolve it to a win win situation.
Very nice that stories now i like this to much
just want to know what a wife can do if she was pressured by her husband not to get pregnant otherwise he will divorse her…….and also to prevent her from getting pregnent he prefere not to approche at all and spend her time with other wife?
Masha Allah, jazakallahu bikyair.
I have a question to ask if a wife is pregnant is it compulsory for her to have sex every day even when she tired or sick .
No it’s ur decision. No body force u.and it is not written in any holy books to force ur wife for anything.It is totally wrong. .
No it’s ur decision. No body force u.and it is not written in any holy books to force ur wife for anything.It is totally wrong. .
Jazakallah Khairan Katheeran. That was a very nice education.
JazakAllah khair
U are talking abt a husband instead of the wife
Duties of a husband but rights of a wife!
Can I boycott my husband in bed to stop his smoking?
to my knowledge, it’s strictly forbidden to boycott him in bed no matter what the case is.. but u can boycott him in kitchen (like stop cooking for him) 🙂
Al Hamdulillah this makes for better and happier marriages.
Thank you!
what does the quran say on a woman not allowing or permitting anybody in her husband’s house but when it is under necessity
Is it good to not go with his wife for shoping and leave her alone even he is free and if she ask her to at least pickup and dropped us he said no i came once you didn’t finish i cant come back even ne does not have any work a d said come with public bus in -13degree with 4 kids at 8pm.
My mother in law don’t want us to come.e to my husband house she fights to the core my husband want me to file a case against her what should I do
My husband lives in England and I live in Canada. We agreed that he would give me my islamic rights financially when I move to England. However, I can’t move to England in the near future. I work fulltime but don’t make much and the process for my legal divorce from my ex husband and to get custody of my daughter is costing me a lot of money. So there is next to nothing left when it comes to buying clothes or saving money. I expressed this to my husband and he simply tries to console me and does not initiate solving the issue by giving me my rights financially. He knows it’s causing lots of stress and resentment on my end towards him as I made sure I was very clear to get my point across the many times the subject came up. However, he has the nerve to complain that I’m a “negative energy” and I often feel distance because of this. He makes good money mashallah and it irks me that he has the nerve to be stingy. His first wife gets her rights but I don’t. I can’t help but feel betrayed. They’re living life comfortably over in England and I’m struggling and living paycheck to paycheck here. How else can I address this? I feel like a hypocrite for going back on my word but at the same time I feel so conflicted because I’m only asking for my basic rights (which honestly, I should not even have to ask for). How else can I confront this issue?
Assalamo alaikom warahmatulahi wa barakatuh sister’s a d brother’s I have my question??? Please
My husband say to me talaq in 3times and he’s angry that the time it is valid or invalid
Jazak allahu khairan
If a wife is pregnant even then his mother is more important to the man than his pregnant wife ?? My husband is away for the past month and I’m third month pregnant he did not take care of me nor got any test of mine now that he is free from work he chose to stay abroad and be with his mother while I’m back home taking care of two kids and house. Will he be answerable to this act or here also I’m wrong to think this way coz against me is his mother who is more important to him than his wife even when she is pregnant
Should a husband allow his mother to run the household
All mentioned here are opposite ways of my husband. I hope he will change In sha Allah. I don’t wish him to be romantic and sweet. At least he can be kind especially in words.
A Man and woman needs equal education and good upbringing, worldly and spiritually, most importantly when they are closer to the age of marriage, they need a clear guidance, we need to learn how to be Muslims and to follow Islam to understand each others responsibilities. we need to stop making Islam into a men’s religion. Islam is a religion of men and women, all beings and creations. All we need is tolerance, patience, love and respect, understanding, education… and an open mind.
Jazzakallah. Awesome sharing brother.